A Philadelphia Eagles Fan’s Guide to the NFL Wild Card Games
By Mike Lacy
How can a Philadelphia Eagles‘ fan survive the playoffs? Here’s how.
The Eagles are not in the playoffs. I know, it’s a bummer, but life goes on, and so does the NFL postseason.
Even though the Birds aren’t involved, we still have four wild card games to look forward to this weekend. I’ll give you a quick summary of what to expect in each game, mention a few former Eagles involved, and explain who Eagles fans should be rooting for.
Kansas City Chiefs at Houston Texans
Super quick preview of the game
The Chiefs – coached by a guy Eagles fans might have heard of – have won their last ten games and will travel to Houston to take on the AFC South champion Texans. Don’t be that impressed by the Texans’ division title; The AFC South might have been even worse than the NFC East this season, and a 9-7 record was enough to give them the crown.
Philadelphia ties
The Chiefs are coached by Andy Reid, so we should have a good idea of what to expect: The running game will be minimized, and there will likely be at least one poorly used timeout and multiple questionable clock management decisions.
The Chiefs’ reading receiver is former Eagle Jeremy Maclin. He had a good – but not great – season, and it’s probably for the best the Eagles didn’t re-sign him. He’s probably better suited as a team’s #2 receiver, but he’s getting paid like a #1. If you have too many guys like that (looking at you, Byron Maxwell), it tends to clog up the salary cap.
Remember how much fun it was to watch Jason Avant catch the ball and then immediately fall down? Well, he’s still doing his thing for the Chiefs! He had 119 receiving yards this season, and I’d guess that 95% of them came before the catch.
Running back Chris Polk is part of a crowded backfield group for the Texans. Polk was effective as a short yardage back in Philly, but after signing DeMarco Murray and Ryan Mathews, the team just let him go for nothing. (Chip Kelly’s specialty!) Polk didn’t get much of a chance to establish himself in Houston. His yards per carry aren’t impressive, but those numbers can often be misleading for a short yardage specialist.
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Who we should root for
Maybe some of you have love for Reid after all his years in Philly. Personally, I couldn’t stand him, and it would be galling to see him win a Super Bowl elsewhere. But come on, now. This is Andy Reid we’re talking about. At some point, a game will require game-plan adjustments or quick thinking, and neither are a Reid specialty.
I’m not sure if a win would help or hinder Chiefs offensive coordinator Doug Pederson’s candidacy for a head coaching job. I kind of want him to be the next Eagles coach, but that’s only because I’ve created a fictional version of him as a beer guzzling bro, and it would give me plenty of material for next season’s game previews.
Did you know?
Texans quarterback Brian Hoyer’s middle name is Axel.
Pittsburgh Steelers at Cincinnati Bengals
Super quick preview of the game
The Steelers squeaked into the playoffs last week, so now they are aiming for their sixth Super Bowl victory. Meanwhile, the Bengals will try to win their first playoff game in about fifty years. Unfortunately for the Bengals, above average starting quarterback Andy Dalton is injured, so the team will likely be led by noted college star A.J. McCarron. It seems inevitable that we’ll get multiple crowd shots of McCarron’s wife Katherine Webb, who was very famously the object of Brent Musberger’s desire a few years ago.
Philadelphia ties
Michael Vick was the Steelers’ backup quarterback for much of the year, and spent time as the team’s starter when Ben Roethlisberger went down with injury. Vick’s quarterbacking skills were never that great, and now that he’s slowed down, he’s basically useless on the field. The Steelers seemed to realize this too and opted to instead use Landry Jones down the stretch.
Brandon Boykin was traded to the Steelers for a low draft pick, but it didn’t seem to help either team much. The Eagles lacked a dependable nickel corner and for whatever reason, Boykin didn’t play all that much with the Steelers.
Who to root for
The Steelers have had enough success. Their fans don’t get a bad enough rap, but in some ways they’re worse than Cowboys fans, mostly because their success didn’t stop 20 years ago. I could do without another offseason of Steelers fans bragging about how great their team is.
On the other hand, Bengals fans have suffered enough. Let them enjoy the sweet taste of playoff victory for once!
Did you know?
The Bengals are 0-8 in playoff games over the past 27 years.
Seattle Seahawks at Minnesota Vikings
Super quick preview of the game
The two-time NFC champion Seahawks will try to make it to their third straight Super Bowl. The Seahawks are known for being especially tough at home, but as the sixth seed, if they want to make it to the big game, they’ll have to win three games on the road.
The Vikings are led by quarterback Teddy Bridgewater. You may recall Bridgewater as one of the quarterbacks the Eagles chose not to take in the first round of the 2014. (I suppose when you can get a guy like Marcus Smith, you have to do it.) He hasn’t established himself as a star, but he’s been a solid compliment to Adrian Peterson and the Vikings’ running game.
Philadelphia ties
Bryce Brown is the Seahawks’ backup running back. Brown showed some flashes with the Eagles in 2012 when he filled in for an injured LeSean McCoy. However, he soon fell out of favor and was traded away for a low draft pick. Brown hasn’t seen much action though, as he only has 72 yards on the season.
The Seahawks also have a pretty good safety named Earl Thomas. In case you hadn’t heard, the Eagles could have picked Thomas in the 2010 draft.
Who to root for
By now, we’ve gotten our fill of the “Eagles should have drafted Earl Thomas!” complaining, but if Bridgewater becomes a star, then we’re going to hear lots of “The Eagles should have drafted Teddy Bridgewater” complaining too. (Personally, I would have gone with Derek Carr.) I realize we’re all sick of the Seahawks by now, but hey, let’s go with the devil we know.
Did you know?
The Eagles could have drafted Earl Thomas in the 2010 draft.
Green Bay Packers at Washington Redskins
Super quick preview of the game
Redskins quarterback Kirk Cousins is trying to prove me wrong and show he’s more than a mediocre quarterback. Thanks to his stellar play down the stretch, the Redskins emerged from a lousy NFC East. It astonishing to think that he might be the best quarterback in this game.
Speaking of quarterbacks, Aaron Rodgers is proof that having a star passer on a lousy team can still be enough to get that team into the playoffs. Still, Rodgers looks like he could use a little help out there. He’s got the body language of someone who’s getting sick of being sacked every five plays or so.
Philadelphia ties
Chip Kelly apologists will point out that DeSean Jackson wasn’t the best performer in the playoffs (if you forget that he had a go-ahead touchdown catch in the 2009 NFC Championship game). Then again, it seems that the Chip apologists have gone into hiding lately. Either way, his playoff prowess is the Redskins’ issue now.
The Redskins recently signed cornerback Cary Williams. Unlike most Eagles fans, I actually liked Williams. Yes, he was mouthy, and no, he shouldn’t have been the team’s best corner. But he brought physical play and a much-needed attitude to a defense that often lacked both.
Who to root for
Just making the playoffs should be enough to ruin the Redskins, I certainly don’t want to see them actually win a game, and have to listen to the insane DC fans as they declare this team to be the greatest in history. Besides, my grandfather is the Packers’ running back, so how could I not root for him?
Next: Peyton Manning an Eagle in 2016?
Did you know?
If a star athlete dates a (moderately) famous actress, and the team starts to struggle, fans will start to blame the actress. Nobody ever said sports fans were rational.
Enjoy your wild card weekend!